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Wednesday, April 27, 2011

linking I am posting this link because the rules to get a free copy of a book were to link this on a blog or something.  I am

Also, I have been doing Couch 2 5k .  Next week will be my 3rd week and I am doing well with it.  I actually really like it.  I am still unsure if I see myself being a 5k runner, but I am going to try like hell

Wednesday, March 30, 2011


today I had the MUNCHIES~  I made the girls Fried French Fries and chicken nuggets and I could not keep my hands off of the french fries.  I was going to go over on calories tonight, but the BFF talked me into my senses.  I so need that girl in my life.  I really was in a I DON'T give a shit kinda mood, but she reminded me that come Monday when the scales not saying good things that I only would have myself to blame.  I love that girl!
It really sucks that some days this comes so easy and other days I just want to give in to every temptation.  I guess I will just have these struggles for the rest of my life so I will have to get used to it. 

Tuesday, March 29, 2011


Nothing exciting really has been going on. I did enjoy 2 pieces of PAPA JOHNS pizza today. One for lunch and one for dinner. It was soooooo good.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Weigh day

In the morning. I hope to be 138. I also did 3 miles today. It was cold, but I made it through and felt good when I was done.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Back in track

Cheated yesterday and back on track today. Usually if I would have a cheat day it would lead to more cheating, but today I'm right back where I should be. It feels good to know I can do that on occasion and not have to worry. I will feel confident with it as long as the scale stays nice on Monday.

Friday, March 25, 2011

cheater cheater

I cheated on calories today.  I shouldn't really let it bother me, but I FEEL SO GUILTY~  I went over by about 700 calories.  The food was really good, but I wish I would have had more will power to  not do it.  Oh well, tomorrow is a new day and back on track I must be!~

Thursday, March 24, 2011


I made the girls shaving cream paint for their baths.  IT WAS A HUGE HIT.  Mya spent 45 minutes in the tub and then I had to tell her to get out.  Then after bath time I made them 5 minute mug cakes and ice cream.  Laken said it was the best snack ever.  LOL

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

that was scary

We had really bad storms that came through the area and I guess tornado's close to my area.  We got small hail here, but others close by had baseball sized hail.  Hopefully hubby's car didn't get damaged while at work.

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

another good feeling

I actually fit into single digit jeans today.  I put 3 pair on and they all fit, well actually are kind of lose.  Now granted I also have 12's that still fit and I guess it all depends on the brand, but I was so happy.  I am also still finding that as much as I hate to have my picture taken (especially the ones for comparison) that I am really happy to have them to look back on.  No wonder I wasn't happy.  Looking back I just cannot believe that I did that to myself.  WHAT WAS I THINKING?

I am even about 10 pounds lighter then this picture now.  I need to get a better comparison soon.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Sunday, March 20, 2011

will it happen?

Tomorrow is weigh day...Will I be in the 130's?  Today I was 139.8  I hope it remains over night.  I better go to bed soon though because I made no bakes, and my brother in law came over and bought some of my favorite pizza and I just started picking.  I NEED TO STOP~ Oh and the treadmill bracket on the other side is now starting to break which is going to really screw up my workouts.  I AM SO PISSED!

Saturday, March 19, 2011

longest day ever

I swear this day just will not end.  I am very cranky today and really didn't do much besides the treadmill, and make dinner.  I had to push hard on the treadmill again.  I still managed to run a mile non-stop though.  I also think that I need to cover the calories burned on my treadmill with tape or something because they are so far off from what my heart rate monitor tells me and it becomes very discouraging.  I hopped on the scale after lunch and it said I was 139.6 so I think as long as I am careful...Monday's weigh in should be a great one.  I love this feeling of being thinner.  I just need to keep reminding myself of that so I do not get out of control again. I can't believe that I am almost 30 pounds lighter then I was 70+ days ago~I have had wonderful and supportive friends to get me where I am.  I am very thankful!

Friday, March 18, 2011

well Hot DAMN

I did it again.  Ran a mile that is.  Now I need to work really hard to make it to a mile and a half.  I really had to push hard to workout today.  I had a headache and just felt so lazy .   Surprisingly though, after I did the treadmill my headache didn't seem to be as bad as it was before.  Sometimes I guess it really does pay to push yourself hard. The weather was GORGEOUS and I am so ready for it to be that way all the time. Also the scale was 140 this morning.  I hope I at least hang onto that number until Monday and Tuesday or even better to be lower then that. 
Time for a really horrible comparison picture again.  Holy fucking fat!~I better NEVER let myself go like that again. 

Thursday, March 17, 2011

naughty leprechauns

Mya woke up around 12:00 and said she had to go to the bathroom.  She rarely ever does that.  I think it was the excitement to see if the leprechauns had paid us a visit.  ( I had to direct her straight to the bathroom even though she tried peeking downstairs).  When we woke up for school, the girls were really excited, but I am not sure I can pull this off another year with Mya.  They thought it was so funny that the toothpaste was in the fridge, the milk was green(which Mya swears made it taste so much better...LOL), the shoes were hanging from door handles, coats in the middle of the floor, toilet paper strung throughout the downstairs, all the snack food was in the living room, toothbrushes on the tv stand, and the toilet water was green because a leprechaun had used the toilet, but didn't flush because they were afraid of waking someone in the house up.  When Mya seen the toilet water she swore it was cleaner.  I told her if it was cleaner it would have a strong smell, but it didn't.  Then she said that the leprechauns have clean smelling pee.  Then they even had to go and wake up daddy to let him know what all had happened in the middle of the night.
Then it was time to get ready for school.  I put some Green hairspray in the girls hair.

 I think they really enjoyed today.  It was something new for us.  They still were bringing it up as I tucked them into bed tonight.

As for me.  I didn't workout today, but I did stay at 1200 calories.  For the last 2 days, I have been up a pound and I am hoping that it will be gone by Monday.  I really cannot wait for that scale to say 139.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

spit it out

So today I made pretty little sugar cookies that are for tomorrow.  I also stuck one in my mouth, chewed it, and then spit it back out.  LMAO.  I was desperate, I wanted to taste it.  I liked it, but then felt super guilty that I had done that.  It was really good though.
I also think they are pretty freaking cute.  Now I am trying to get creative because they leprechauns have to come trash my house tonight.  We are not IRISH, but I thought this would be super fun for the girls to be able to do.  We made a trap to try to catch those sneaky little guys.  I colored the milk green, I toilet papered the inside of the house a little.  (cant be wasting to much TP.  that stuff is way to expensive)  I moved their toothbrushes and toothpaste, I moved all the snack food into the livingroom, before they wake up in the morning I plan to make the toilet water Green,  and I am not sure what else I am going to do, but I hope it is enough to get the girls laughing their butts off in the morning.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011


Good gravy! I don't know what the deal is with me today. I am not hungry, yet I find that I keep shoving shit in my mouth. I was going to have a no workout day, but since I went over 1200 calories I had to workout. I only burned 300 calories, but I did end up running 1.25 miles non stop. I don't think I've ever done that. I just hope that even though I ate around 200 calories
Over, that I confuse my metabolism because if I gain by my weigh in, I'm goin to be super pissed at myself.

Monday, March 14, 2011

Great day

My mom took the girls and I to the mall today and then out to eat. We went to Perkins. I had chicken noodle soup. Out of everything that I could have chosen I picked the 150 calorie menu item.
I'm down 26 pounds now and totally stoked!

Oh and did u see the bachelor tonight ? Wow all I can say is wtf. Lol

Sunday, March 13, 2011

big accomplishment

Today I reached a HUGE accomplishment: I RAN A MILE NON STOP~ that was right after I had walked 3.75 miles. I went a total of 5 miles today. I know that to some, this may not be a huge thing.  For me it is.  Even back when I was in high school and middle school I could only do good at the short distance runs, but never the long distance.  I burned over 500 calories and I whined like a little baby on my last .25.  That is okay though because I freaking did it. I pushed through the pain because I wanted to be able to feel accomplished.  70 days ago it was hard for me to walk a mile and now I ran one.  I hope in another 70 days I can run 2 miles.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Running and running

Well the treadmill has made it 7 miles without breaking.  I think it is really fixed this time.  Back in January it was really hard for me to go 4 MPH and today, I was doing HIIT for 20 minutes.  My highest MPH was a 7.  I am so impressed with myself.  I am hoping that when my Brother in Law comes in for a visit in the Spring that I will be able to go for a run with him.  He is an avid runner.  He runs 3-4 miles 5 days a week and has for years.  I HAVE NEVER been a runner. Today I went 4 miles on the treadmill that is both running and walking. The most I have ever run straight was a mile and that was years ago.  Today I ran 6 minutes straight and I will be happy with that.  My feet hurt though.  I think I have blisters.  Wonder how well I will do tomorrow.  I am excited about this journey I am on.  Some days more then others. COME ON 130's I can smell you!

Friday, March 11, 2011

its fixed

I am so stinking excited.  Hubby took my treadmill to his friend's house again.  The friend made a brand new bracket and put it on.  It seems like it is going to work out fine.  I went 3 miles and went a max of 6 mph.  It is going to be so nice to have it back and not have to do boring workouts of running in place and having to not worry about the weather.  I have been slacking on calorie burns lately and I think that I should do much better now.  So today I did Zumba and 3 miles on the treadmill and burned over 500 calories. I know I have said it before, but I am so happy to also have my heart rate monitor because now that I have it and the treadmill, I was able to see that the treadmill really isn't accurate on calories for me.  It is at least 50 calories off which makes a big difference.  It is really accurate though at the miles.  Hopefully now things will start looking better on the exercise and weight loss will start coming off even faster.  So guy who I don't know that spent time fixing my treadmill for me. I Think I love you.  THANK  YOU SO MUCH!

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Take 2

Tomorrow my husband will be taking my treadmill to his friends house again. The guy created a new bracket for it. I really hope it works, bur I have kept my expectations low. I don't want to feel disappointed again.
I realized today that I am only 3 pounds away from being in the 130's. Thank goodness for that. I can't wait to be for my bmi to be down to normal.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Cauliflower Pizza

I know this has been done on a lot of blogs, but I checked a ton of them out before making it myself and I feel there just can't be to many. I think the way I made mine ended up having way to many calories. You live and you learn though. THE KIDS HATED THIS. I loved it and my neighbor loved it, her daughter who has celiacs thinks she liked it, but I really didn't have much to share with her. I was really impressed that it was sort of the consistency of bread. It wasn't dry at all really. Some people say that you don't need to like cauliflower to like this pizza...I kind of feel that you do.

so there it is:  MY REVIEW~

Warning if you are new to my blog, you may be offended reading any other posts because I swear A LOT.  

Monday, March 7, 2011


I'm just a few ounces away from a 25 pound loss. I am beyond thrilled. Bill took the broken bracket to a guy at work today. He said he will try to rig something up to fit in it's Place. I just wish I had money to purchase a new one. Hopefully since I do not have money, this guy will figure something out. If not then this damn weather needs to clear up so I can walk outside or do something.


Not sure WTF is wrong here, but somehow I keep forgetting to blog. So again, this is for yesterday. The battery died in my scale. Which for me the one who steps on it everytime I go to the bathroom is probably a good thing, but I'm going sucking futs. hopefully I will be making a trip to the store to replace it today. I've done well with stayin in the 1200 calorie range this past week. Exercise was not at it's best, but hopefully I will be down on the scale. Maybe today's post, as long as I remember will be about a great loss.

Sunday, March 6, 2011


I meant to blog last night, but totally forgot. Bill, the kids and I went roller skating last night with a bunch of friends. I stayed off of the skates because I didn't think I could control my daughter's feet and mine at the same time. Laken(4) caught on pretty quickly. She couldn't get the full on skate, but she got around great. Mya (7)on the other hand has 2 left feet. She did get better towards the end though. Bill just cracks me the fuck up. By the end of the night, I think Bill was back in his groove from 30 years ago. He was getting the crossovers in his feet, leaning into his turns, and skating backwards. The only thing missing was a mullet(as said by one friend) and bell bottom pants. I laughed so hard. I have one video that I have watched probably 25 times and each time I watch it I laugh so hard. Now I have to worry because all of my friends are saying they are getting me in skates the next time. Since I made fun of Bill so bad, I could be in for some trouble. LOL~

Friday, March 4, 2011


There was a tragic accident today that killed a 17 year old girl. It has totally broken my heart. I pray for this girls family. I cannot imagine having to deal with the loss is a child. I didnt know this girl, but it has made Me so sad and so sick to my stomach today.

Thursday, March 3, 2011


Finally my hubby found someone to weld the snapped bracket on my treadmill and after 3.5 miles of working out, it snapped again. I'm so sad. I was so ready to be able to workout on it again. Hopefully the guy that fixed it will be able to rig it another way. At least the weather should be clearing up for more frequent walks outside. It is just so hard with the schedule my family is on.

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

I feel like I starved today. I ate my 1200 calories, but I just wanted to binge. I smelled girl scout cookies on several occasions today, but I didn't give in. I Still have something going on with my stomach and so I'm lacking workouts. Hopefully my treadmill will be fixed tomorrow and workouts will be more frequent.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011


Today my friends Mom who I haven't seen for a while, stopped over my house. When she came in she said, "You lost some weight" ( both her daughter's know that I have been working out and watching my calories), but I don't think she did. It felt great that she noticed. It is days like this that help me to remember why I am working so damn hard. Also today when I had to go to my daughters' pre-k registration...I actually didn't feel embarrassed to be in front of everyone and feel like I was being stared at. Some weeks it is so easy to be positive, but other weeks so hard. I hope this feeling lasts a while this time.

Monday, February 28, 2011

tonight is a night

I feel like I want to eat away my sadness. Tomorrow I register my baby for Pre-K~ How the hell did time go so fast? Instead, this will be a quick post so that I can go to bed and not have to feel the guilt of over eating. Hopefully tomorrow I will not have an overly hungry day

Sunday, February 27, 2011

22 pounds

I AM DOWN 22 FLIPPING POUNDS~ I felt horrible before bed last night because I ate chocolate popcorn and at least 1/2 a cup. Though it must not have been that bad because I had to weigh in today for a challenge I joined on MFP and I was down 3 pounds from last week. YAYAYAYAYAY~~145 baby. 6 pounds until I am in the 130's!!!I am so excited!~

Saturday, February 26, 2011


I did so good for so long and I thought that meant that I could be strong enough to make my kids a yummy snack. I made them Chocolate popcorn. A WEEK BEFORE MY PERIOD IS TO COME! What the hell was I thinking? I went over on my calories and tomorrow I am supposed to weigh in. STUPID ASS MOVE~
Here is a before and so far picture of me. The first one is around the beginning of January and then the other is from yesterday. WHAT A FREAKING DIFFERENCE

Thursday, February 24, 2011

got a very good letter

today from Mya's teacher. It was about how polite and well mannered she is. It also said that she helps others and it a real joy to have in class. That she thinks Mya's dad and I should be commended as parents. That letter was so touching to me. I am so glad that Mya has had some terrific teachers so far.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011


despite how much I didn't want to try Zumba again, I did. This time I actually liked it a lot more then the first time. Burned almost 600 calories (which is always a good thing) Tomorrow I may try again. Seriously I worked up a sweat and never do I say that I felt good after a workout, but I can honestly say this time I feel AWESOME! I hope the scale works out this week in my favor~!~

Tuesday, February 22, 2011


I do not know what my deal is, but today I am just so cranky! It is bad. Everything annoys me and certain people annoy me and I am just ready for bed. I really didnt do bad with me eating today, I went over on carbs a little which irritated me, but I couldn't help it. I so very badly wanted a hot piece of garlic bread. On a good note, Bill thinks he may have found someone to weld the treadmill. Gosh, I hope it gets fixed soon. I miss it even though when I have it, I hate it. It is a love- hate relationship.

Monday, February 21, 2011

this weather stinks

We had 2 gorgeous days here last week and I took advantage of both days with a 4 mile walk and a 4.25 mile walk. It was wet and cold here today, but I decided I was going to go out and start the couch to 5k program. Just as I was ready to go out the door it started to rain again. Did I say forget it and not do it? Nope...I did it in my house. Not sure if I ran exactly the amount in the program, but I did try to keep my heart rate in the zone while I did it. When I was finished, there wasn't enough calories burned and so I did my wii cardio until I reached over 300 calories. Today I think I saw a difference in my body. I still do not like the way I look, but I think it looked a little more slimmer than my previous pictures. I have to start looking at myself more because my scale is making me depressed and I cannot do that to myself. It isn't what the scale says. I know I have been working hard and that I am staying in my calorie allowance. I just have to make myself believe what I am typing. LOL

Sunday, February 20, 2011

busy day

today has been crazy busy. I needed to go pick up a cake to celebrate my daughters birthday/nephews birthday, but my neighbor called and was having issues with her computer and her oldest needed to do college homework. So I went and fixed that quickly and then picked up the cake. Came home and had a party and had to fix 4 ipods to do facetime and text and set up emails. Then had to go back to my neighbors to finish working on the computer fixing problem. I think for today I might have actually had more computers then I like to have to deal with. At least it made me feel smart for a day.
I am also a little annoyed with myself. I only lost like 8 ounces this past week after working so hard and by accident I ate 40 calories over my allowed amount today because I forgot to track a snack. DAMN. It is crazy how that little amount of going over is enough to piss me off these days. I guess in a way getting mad about it is a good thing. That way I am not still making up excuses and staying fat because of them. Back to being better tomorrow. I will not be staying in the 140's.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

No cakey

Tomorrow my family will be celebrating Mya's birthday and my nephews. Which means cake and ice cream oh and my Mom is making cake balls (which I have not ever tried) and will still not be trying them. I am changing my weigh in day to Sundays now because I joined a group on MFP. So I hope tomorrow I will be down a pound or 2. I have really been having problems with my knee. It is grinding which concerns me, but I hate doctors and so therefor I may never know what the hell is wrong with it. It aches so bad tonight that it is making me sick.

Friday, February 18, 2011

forget full

is what I am becoming. I was laying comfortably and half a sleep in my nice cozy bed when it hit me that once again I was forgetting to write my blog. That is all I have to go now. There is something going on that I have to pay attention to

Thursday, February 17, 2011


Hell yeah~ That is what I walked/jogged today in just a little over an hour! Talk about feeling accomplished. I have been busting my ass this week and I hope that it shows on the scale Monday, but even if it doesn't...I cannot get discouraged because I know I have been working hard and eating my calorie allowance and my clothes are a lot less snug. I actually think I feel thinner to. I cannot wait until the end of March because I should be in the 130's. I have worked so hard!~

damn FAIL~

As I was working out today, it hit me that I forgot to post yesterday. SHIT~ I don't know how I let this happen. I am really disappointed that I did that because I was on such a streak. So I am making it up today. Not that it matters because nobody reads this blog anyway. Okay so that is a lie BFF reads it, but that is all. THANKS BFF!
I walked 4 miles outside in the beautiful weather. It is so crazy how fast your stamina comes back. Just a month ago walking a mile about killed me and now I can walk 3 times that. I was so proud of myself~

Tuesday, February 15, 2011


TO HAVE THE FUCKING COLD SORES ON MY LIP? They hurt so bad and are so fuckin ugly :(
They need to hurry and leave. They started out as one tiny zit and then grew into one cold sore blister and then this morning when I woke up there was 3 of those stupid things. GO AWAY UGLY GROWTHS I HATE YOU!

Monday, February 14, 2011


Today I am 34 years old! Holy crap, where has the time gone? Seems like I was just a kid and now suddenly I have a 7 and 4 year old. When your a kid, they try and tell you not to rush growing up because when your grown time just goes so fast. I wish I would have believed all that told me that. So today I have this GINORMOUS cold sore on my lip. How lovely to celebrate 34 years with this lip the size of a planet? :-(
I can't let that get my down though because today I woke up and my scale said 149. That's right 149~ 19 pounds lost since I began this journey!~ 19 pounds to go until I reach my first goal. I decided that since I can't seem to notice a difference I could try on something that didn't fit me a few weeks ago to see if I could tell that way. WELL HOT DAMN~ I fit into the pants I couldn't get over my ass a few weeks ago. I got them over my ass, zipped and buttoned~~ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME~

Sunday, February 13, 2011

had a nice visit

from my parents today. I thought they were coming to eat some of my delicious wedding soup I made yesterday and to give the girls valentine presents(which they did), but also they brought me a birthday present( I turn 34 tomorrow). I didn't expect anything at all. Most people would not get so excited over the gift I got, but I so desperately needed this gift. They bought me a Bissel 3-in-1 vac. It works so well on tile and laminate flooring. It also has a nifty crevice tool that works way better then my big vacuums crevice tool.

Here is the nifty little sweeper that I love. It is the little things in life that make me so happy. LOL

Saturday, February 12, 2011

valentine hair

yesterday Mya had her valentines party at school since they do not have school on valentines day. I love the blog adopt a do and live by it religiously. Seriously, that woman is freaking awesome. Here is how Mya's hair looked

How cute is that? FOR REAL! LOVE IT!!!!

Friday, February 11, 2011


So happy that I finally have tile down in my bathroom. We had to tear the carpet out a few months ago due to the toilet over flowing. I am so happy to have the carpet out because carpet in a bathroom is just NASTY~

Thursday, February 10, 2011


Today is Mya's 100th day if school, so I put her hair into 1 braid and 2 buns to make it look like 100.

80 more days left!

Wednesday, February 9, 2011


I think my scale made it over the HUMP today, but I can't really count it until weigh in day on Monday. I was really excited when it said 148 this morning when I woke up. I even got butterflies in my tummy when I seen that and wanted to cry. I hope I will be strong enough to NEVER let myself go again. It is way to hard to get it back off.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

woo hoo

Glee is back on, my Bff is back to the dieting with me and there is a 2 hour delay tomorrow. It just doesn't get much better then that!~

Monday, February 7, 2011


I lost weight again and now have lost a total of 16 pounds. Next week I should actually be in the 140's!!!!WHOOT WHOOT~

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Mya turned 7

I cannot believe that I had my first born 7 years ago. I am so blessed!! As much as she drives me nutty and as much as she becomes more smart mouthed as time goes by...I LOVE HER MORE THEN LIFE~ My mom worked really hard to make her cute Panda bear cupcakes so she could take them to school tomorrow. My mom is such a fantastic person. She stayed up past 2 am trying to finish these.

Are they not one of the cutest cupcakes you have ever seen before? They sure looked tasty, but I stayed true to myself and my diet. Tomorrow is my weekly weigh in and I don't want to be mad at myself or the scale. I have seen the 160's (almost 170's), 150's and I know it wont be tomorrow, but I can't wait to get into the 140's. I know that is a high number still, but it will get into the 130's!

Oh and I am sorry to all my die hard Steeler fan's~

Saturday, February 5, 2011

another day

and still sticking to this diet thing. I am still doing well with eating a 1200 calorie diet. Some days being harder then others. What I am really struggling with is working out. We finally did get the Wii so now I just have to work on getting a workout game for it. I really wish my treadmill wasn't broken. I really do miss that miserable thing. I still have the rest of today and all of tomorrow to lose for the week. This morning I was still only down .8. Not happy with that, but as long as the scale is moving down and not up, I need to like the numbers.

Friday, February 4, 2011


I have officially beat my old blogging record. WHOOT! This is the 41st post. I AM SO FREAKING PROUD OF MYSELF~
I also think my body became scared after my post yesterday because when I woke up this morning I got on the scale and it said that I have lost .8 pounds for the week. My weigh in day is on Monday, so I think by then it will be over a pound. (AT LEAST IT BETTER BE)! I am also getting very excited for Monday because my partner in crime will be back on track. I was lonely without her.

Thursday, February 3, 2011


I got my period. It was late. I gained a pound! I am PISSED off! I feel Fat~ GO THE FUCK AWAY

Wednesday, February 2, 2011


to stay positive, but my scale was up a pound today. It must be water weight or something because I have not cheated at all. This is going to be a short post. It is super windy out and I am going to bed. Hoping for a better day tomorrow. PEACE

Tuesday, February 1, 2011


has been falling off and on since yesterday and is to continue until mid day tomorrow. I think the kids will not have school and that is fine by me. The first time I went out to shovel today I forgot to wear my heart rate monitor and that really sucks. I always wondered how many calories you really burn cleaning up snow and ice. The 2nd time I went out, I did wear it and I burned 156 calories in 24 minutes. Every time I would log my exercise on myfitness pal, I had a hard time believing that I actually burned that many calories shoveling. I don't know how I never knew of these HRM watches, but as long as I am working out, I WILL HAVE ONE! I think it is a must when your a calorie tracker like myself. Also since having my watch I realize that my high heart rate that I used to still high. That is concerning me enough to know that I HAVE TO KEEP losing this weight. I cannot make excuse I am far to young to be having a heart attack or stroke. I need to get healthy so that I am here for my girls. I also have managed to not step on my scale at night for the last 2 nights. It's been hard, but it just doesn't make sense to step on a scale at the very end of a day. After eating and drinking. Why would I weigh less at night? Sometimes I am just a DORK!

Monday, January 31, 2011


this was my first time ever working out to Zumba. I am still unsure of my thoughts. I am not coordinated and that surely showed. I do however, like that it burned almost 600 calories for 1 hour. That was without me doing all the moves because I would get so lost. I will try it again though. Today was my weigh in day and I am down a total of 14 pounds for the month! WHOOP~ Come on February... I am going to kick your ASS~ BRING IT!~

Sunday, January 30, 2011


that is what it was for me to go to my nephews birthday party today. My mom made adorable cupcakes and I wanted one so bad, but I DID NOT CAVE. Afterwards, we went to McDonalds and I did not order anything from there. I went to Bilo for my dinner. Though it was frozen, it was 400 calories! It is the end of the day and I am still way under my calories. Tomorrow is my weekly weigh in. I hope the scale is as nice tomorrow as it was today. Keeping my fingers crossed!~

Saturday, January 29, 2011

I am feeling

AWESOME! Like I actually have this shit in the fucking bag. I will be thin again. I have so much support. It is crazy just how a few words of encouragement from facebook friends can hype me up! I got my heart rate monitor watch today and its so cool! It feels great to know that when it says I burn 300 calories that it is more likely I did rather then the guessing of an ipod or a treadmill would say. I love that at the end of the day when I finish logging my calories that I am at my calorie allowance and not over. SO ACCOMPLISHED!

My picture for the day is of Mya and Laken playing school with their babies. It was such a cute moment and though this shot is very snap shotty..I LOVE IT~

Friday, January 28, 2011

gaining guilt

Today I had planned out what I was going to eat when I went to my Mom's. I decided I would have 2 pieces of pizza, but my husband and Mom had some of my favorite Chinese food. I was doing well...until I walked by an egg roll. I just could not turn it away. I tried, but I caved. Then I felt so guilty that I came home and ran 2 miles in my house. I burned 200 calories and I am hoping that egg roll wasn't anymore calories then that. I don't know if there has ever been a time in my life where I would have cared so much that I cheated, that I would need to come home and try to work that off. I hope this is finally my time that I am serious enough about this weight loss thing. Time will tell, but someone told me that it takes 28 days to make something a habit and I am on day 25 of this. 3 more days!!!
I ordered a heart rate monitor watch. I hope it is a good one.
It's ugly, but I won't care as long as it helps me track my calories.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

I think it is pretty amazing

how after dieting for almost a month, how much my tastes have changed. I am not saying that I do not crave a whole cheesecake, or a whole thing of cornbread...because at at anytime I would eat them. Today, I find myself really looking at recipes that I never in a million years would have thought I would make or eat. Baked sweet potato fries,baked bananas,broccoli and cheese stuffed chicken! REALLY? Who is this girl? The thing that makes me making these meals hard, is that there is no way in a million years my family would eat them. So when I make something like this, it will be my meal for a week. I am still sucking at the workout thing though. It will come to me...Just going to take some time!~

Here is a picture I took of Laken today to remind me that even though I hate Kool-aid stain mustaches, that some day when my kids are all grown...I am going to miss them.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

holy shit balls!

this will be a super quick post because I was in bed and then realized...I did not do my blog. So

Laken was bored today and made herself a homemade case out of an empty toilet paper roll. My girly is creative I tell ya!

Then today we got hit hard with a ton of snow. When it decided it was going to start coming down, it was falling fast. Mya's bus was 30 minutes late and I heard a lot of Sirens. I was so ready to cry. There I was no cell phone and totally feeling hopeless and scared. I figured she was late do to the roads being a mess, but as a Mom, I couldn't stop my mind from wondering. Here is the shitty roads while I waited.
I am hoping for no school tomorrow, but the snow has stopped.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

this will be short and sweet

It is TUESDAY and I have still stuck to my diet this week! 1200 calories a day and just a little bit of exercise. My birthday is on the 14th and my goal is to be 149. It may or may not happen, but that is what I am going with for now. Wish me luck!

Monday, January 24, 2011

how is this possible?

today when I weighed myself I was 157 and after posting my numbers this is what myfitnesspal calculated as my weight loss. LMAO!~ I think something is wrong. the real numbers are that I have actually lost 10.8 pounds in the last 21 days. Average of 3.6 pounds a week. I have 27.2 pounds to go until my first goal! I have 97 days to get to my first goal. I am still struggling with the working out, but as long as I am watching what I am eating...I think I will be ok.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

today was so nice

because I did something that I rarely get to do these days...Spend a few hours with my awesome MOM! We went to the mall and walked around. It was so nice just to have some mom and daughter time because that is something that I do not get to do very often and no matter how old you are...your never to old to have time alone with your mom. One of the first things she wanted to do was to get something to eat. I was strong and just got a water. It was tough, but I did it. That made me proud :)

Saturday, January 22, 2011


in need of a welder. I didn't want to walk in the house today so I thought I would carefully walk on the broken treadmill. I was about 3 minutes into my walk when I felt a weird bouncing feeling. DAMN! this is what I felt

Good thing I didn't keep going. Who knows what might have happened. So I guess its back to walking in the house on cold days and walking out side when it gets warmer. I cannot wait to get my taxes back so that I can get Mya me the Wii. I think I may try out that new Zumba game. I just hope I keep motivated and not give up. I tried on a pair of pants today that I wore in September (just 4 short months ago) and I couldn't even get them over my ass. That is simply sad. So I MUST STAY MOTIVATED.

Friday, January 21, 2011

I just love

this picture I snapped of Laken today. I don't really ever say I LOVE MY PICTURES, but I do say that with this one.

Thursday, January 20, 2011


Today I walked up and down my steps 33 times. That took me a total of 10 minutes. I originally planned on doing that for 30 minutes, but that idea quickly went right out the window. I then walked around my living room and kitchen for a total of 3 miles. I am trying to stay dedicated. Then my family had Long John Silvers for dinner. They have a lower calorie option and so I opted for the grilled tilapia and vegetables and rice. Also you get a really good thing of bread. It was good, but I was still wishing that I was eating what my family was eating. Then they wanted to eat something sweet. As hard as it was for me, I made them no bakes and I didn't even taste them. I feel shaky because I want to eat them, but I WILL NOT! I have enough calories left in my day, that I could probably have one, but I know that when I cheat, it is all over :( So I am going to keep a clear picture in my head of how flabby my ass is and if I cheat it will never be a pretty little ass again.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

I took the walk

outside today. It was freezing cold and by the time I was getting close to being done, it started to rain. The ground was such a sloppy mess and in spots very slippy! I thought I was going to be able to go down this one road we have around here and it would be 3 miles the whole way down and back, but I was way off! It was only about 2 miles down and back. I ended up doing a total of 3 miles today though. Funny how different 3 miles feels outside compared to a treadmill. The almighty Ipod came in handy for sure today. Then my friend Jodi has been begging me to go check out Zumba. She does it and loves it, but I am always to shy to go to these kinds of things. I also was afraid I wouldn't be coordinated enough. After giving it some thought, I decided to go watch a class. I could not believe how much fun it looked and how welcoming the people were. I think I just may go to a class every now and then. It will be hard for me to do it a lot. Being a stay at home mom, I won't get much of a chance to go or have money to do it all the time. I do want to go and try it sometime. I will be proud of myself when I do go because I have a hard time with self esteem and always worry about what others will think of me. Oh and I was under my calorie goal again today. When I logged my calories it said if I ate every day the way I did today in 5 weeks I will be 147 I think. I hope that is an accurate number :)

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

there are no excuses

Yesterday I was ready to give up on the idea of losing weight. I couldn't think how I wanted to exercise being that my treadmill broke! Bff Said there are no excuses and if I am going to make excuses then I am going to be fat. I gave it a lot of thought and she is right! So today I ran 3 miles in my livingroom just by going back and forth. Yes it may sound funny, but I was very sweaty when I was done so I think it did something!~ This again is where Ipods are wonderful. I used my handy dandy cool new app. that I bought a week or 2 ago and I feel that it is pretty accurate. So I guess until we get the wii in this house I will be wearing out my floors. Thanks again BFF for pushing me.
here are my 2 pictures today that I took and like

Click on the image for better quality :)

Monday, January 17, 2011


My treadmill has a brace that is breaking on it. I am so sad. I can't use it and it is to cold to workout outside. I am making excuses! This is the reason I stay fat~ Mya is getting a Wii for her birthday so hopefully once we get that, I will be back to doing some kind of workout. I am still trying to watch my calorie intake. Though I gained 4 pounds on the weekend having my Mommies night out. I swore I wouldn't eat or drink, but...I caved.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Mommies Night Out

I was invited for a Mommies night out. I really didn't think I wanted to go. After all, this would only be the 2nd time is 6 years that I left my husband and kids to go out and have me time. I am so glad I did it though. We had so much fun and laughed so hard. I was loud and maybe obnoxious, but I had fun dammit! I broke the rules of my diet and drank a shit ton of alcohol and I ate...LOTS!~

Saturday, January 15, 2011


was finally warm enough for the kids to go out and play in the snow for a short bit. They made snowmen, snowAngels and snowballs! Then came into the house and Daddy made them a cup of hot chocolate and I heated them both a blanket in the dryer.

you can see in the pictures that they clearly were having a great time! How can you love so much snow when your little and HATE it when your grown? I wouldn't mind if I never seen the white crap again! The only thing I love about snow is that my kids sometimes get to stay home from school! Call me strange, but I LOVE when Mya gets to stay home.

OH and by the way today is also an extreme hunger day for me.

Friday, January 14, 2011


I did the treadmill not once, but twice~ I burned 300 calories and then I didn't do any shoveling so 300 calories is what it was. The Bff said,"that's it?" So after I got off the phone with her, I got back on and did another 157! I would have done one more mile after dinner, but I was afraid I would over do it and not want to work out tomorrow. I really wanted to say "FUCK YOU BFF!", but I took that as a good thing and filtered my mouth. If it is one thing BFF has taught me, it is that sometimes I need to FILTER(watch what I say and when)! I know she didn't mean it badly because I know how to take her! I am glad she is the way that she is because she makes me driven! Now when I am under 160, I can thank her for making me want to do that extra mile! Thanks BFF. I LOVE YOU!

Thursday, January 13, 2011

much better of a day

today then yesterday! I got a new app for my ipod and I think it motivated me a lot. IPODS are the best invention ever! I love that there is so much that it can do to occupy me while I am on the treadmill! I can watch movies, listen to music, play scrabble, text or just use an app! 4 more days until I weigh in and I am almost under 160 pounds. YAY~

Another snow day today, so my picture of the day was of my girlies

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

the last 2 days

I have stuck to my calorie allowance, but I have had one hell of a time working out. Yesterday, I took the day off and today I forced myself to do it! I wanted to quit the entire time, so I texted my bff and she helped me through the horrible time I was having!
Here is the conversation just to show how much of a complainer I am

Me:I'm on the stupid thing
bff:then she said something she may not want reapeated
bff: :)
me: this is Stupid
bff: :(
me:I hate it
bff:but the results wont be :)
me: I hope
Hate it
bff: Don't hate it. Hate the food you put in your mouth. It's the foods fault we are fat.
Me:it's my mouth fault. Stupid fucking thing
bff:Mine too
me:.25 miles
me: 36 more minutes
waits a while
Bff: How are ya?
Me: effin stupid
bff:I know your stupid
me:I'm having a hard time
bff: with what?
Me:doing it
my calves are hurting bad
1 mile
bff:You can do it!!!!
me:I am! It might take me longer today
127 calories
bff: U r doing it!!!
me:thanks to u
bff:want me to call?
or face chat?
me:oh I cat talk
not sure if I could hear on face chat
Bff: Mmmmmm I like cats
me:lol, this is helping me lots
me: I swear I smell food cooking
bff:did you fart?
thats the food you smell
me:bwahahaha, thats effin funny
this is just a piece of my whiny ass! I sure hope I get more into this by the end of the week.

picture of the day: ITS BLOODY COLD

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

1st math test

Mya had her very first math test and scored a perfect. I am so proud of her. The teacher sent home a website that the kids can practice their math skills with. I think I really like it. The goal is to get the kids to answer the questions within 3 seconds of being asked. I think it really has helped that we practice on in every day.
For my picture of the day, I snapped a shot of her practicing on the site. Even though its a simple picture, I LOVE IT!

Monday, January 10, 2011

very excited to say

That it has been six days since I began the dieting and exercise and I am down 6 pounds and some ounces.!!!! The exercising has been the hardest for me to stick to. I have such a hard time staying motivated, but I have pushed myself so hard. I really, really hope that next week I am back into the 150's. After all, that is only 2 pounds away. I think it is possible. I do have to admit that today as I made my coffee with the carefully measured out creamer of 2 tablespoons; that I licked that spoon clean of all creamer stuck to it. Sadly if there was a fly on the wall watching, it probably looked as though I was performing a sex act of sorts. It almost was as satisfying as sex to~ oh...and on another note...I think this is my 19th post. Might actually just be a record! Maybe this will be MY year!

Sunday, January 9, 2011


is how I feel today. Managed to get my 300 calories burned on the treadmill though and tomorrow is weigh day. I just have to remember that a loss is a loss. That way I can try to not get disappointed even if it is only a pound.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Sticking to it

the diet that is. I've almost made it a week now. I think I am doing very well except that I just made the really huge mistake of stepping on the scale at 8 o'clock at night. When I checked my weight this morning I was down 5 pounds, just now I was down 1. I know I shouldn't go by that, but now I am nervous. Nervous...Not discouraged! As long as I stick to watching my calories and exercise the scale should never not be friends with me again. I did make another good dinner today. Even the kids liked it. In my book, that is a keeper.

1 lb browned and seasoned ground Beef (Italian sausage can be substituted)
3/4 lb.spaghetti, cooked
1 jar (approx 15 oz) of your favorite pasta sauce
2 cups Mozzarella Cheese, grated

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

In a large sauce pan, simmer meat and tomato sauce together. Toss the cooked noodles in the sauce.

To Assemble: Spray a casserole dish with non stick cooking spray. Spoon half of the noodle mixture into the dish. Pack it down lightly and sprinkle on half of the cheese. Add the other half of the spaghetti, pack down lightly and top with the rest of the cheese. Bake for approximately 15-20 minutes or until the cheese is bubbly. Serve with a green salad and crusty garlic bread.

I didn't have the garlic bread, but it is still fantastic!

Friday, January 7, 2011


That was one good fucking meal! I'm pretty sure it was that good and not just because I am on a diet. I did go a little overboard with the eating, but I think I am still within my calorie allowance! Just because I thought it tasted so damn good, I am going to post the recipe so YA'LL can try it. HA HA~ I'm not really southern, but I think I was suppose to be born as such. I say Ya'll cause the recipe is from PAULA DEENS site. ITS FUCKINGDELISH~

Hobo Hamburgers

Hobo Hamburgers Recipe Courtesy of Paula Deen

Servings: 4 patties, approximately 6 ounces each
Prep Time: 15 min
Cook Time: 45 min
Difficulty: Easy

1 1/2 lb ground beef
1 cup cracker crumbs
1 egg, beaten
1/4 cup lemon juice
1 cup grated cheese
1/2 cup chopped green pepper
2 teaspoon Paula Deen’s House Seasoning
4 medium red potatoes, sliced thin
1 large onion, sliced thin
4 carrots, peeled and cut into strips
4 slices bacon \

In a large bowl combine ground beef, cracker crumbs, egg, lemon juice, cheese, green pepper and House Seasoning. Mix well. Shape into 4 patties.

Place each patty onto 2 layers of heavy-duty aluminum foil (enough to cover and close). On each patty, place potato slices, onion slice, and carrots. Slice bacon in half and place both slices on top. Seal aluminum foil tightly and cook on campfire or in a 350 degree oven for approximately 45 minutes.

Recipe courtesy Paula Deen
Show: Paula's Home Cooking

Thursday, January 6, 2011

whopper and cheesecake

that is my daily craving. Craving it, but not going for the craving. I am still doing well on my diet and exercise. 4 more days until the first weigh in. I think as long as I continue this path...I will have a good result.

Today I was on the phone with my bff. I told her it was snowing outside. That is when Laken (4) decided to pop into the conversation
Me to bff:It is snowing outside
Laken:No it's not
I open the blind and say
me:Then what is that out there?

such crazy and funny girls I have.
Im sure it isn't as amusing here as it was in person. I know it must be one of those had to be there to really "get" the humor in it type of things. That's ok though. Just wanted to document a moment that I enjoyed!

Wednesday, January 5, 2011


Today has been kind of rough. I am really a crank ass today. I am not hungry, but I want food BAD!~ I feel like a drug addict! Not that I really know what a drug addict feels like, but I would assume it to be almost the same as this. OK, I am actually thinking that would be worse, but this is bad! As hard as it was for me to do the treadmill today, I did. I wanted to stop when I was below 100 calories burned, but I kept thinking of the super hot ass I want to have and it made me push myself harder. So I walked for 48 minutes and burned over 300 calories. I was pretty happy with that. Now I just need to work on getting those 300 calories burned faster then I did. I sure hope the scale is nice to me on Monday. I actually can't stay off the scale and have weighed myself every day so far. At this point I have lost 2 pounds. I think I am off to a good start.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Day 2

of the diet. I am doing ok so far. I'm not really starving, but I really miss food! on a good note, I did burn 122 calories more today then yesterday on a bad note I am still a bitch. THIS WILL BE WORTH IT! RIGHT? yes it will. I need this to not only feel better about myself, but to also stay healthy to raise my girls for a long time. I NEED to do this. I am heading straight for heart problems (which I already have) and diabetes. I need to do this.....

a fellow photographer shared a cool technique today and I gave it a shot. Mine isn't as pretty, but pretty enough.

Thanks for the lesson girls~ you rock!

Monday, January 3, 2011

Cranky McCrankerson

what is that disgustingly high ass number you ask? Well sadly, it is my current weight. How in the world did I let myself become this size? I am considered obese! Today I am beginning to work on that though. I did the treadmill and burned off 179 calories, which is way lower of a number then I should have done, but I am working slowly. Eventually I will be burning at least 300 calories a day. Oh and I am watching my calorie intake which I am sure is about 2,349,903,453,464,546 X's less then what I have been eating. So this girl is a CRAB today. I did take some before pictures so that at some point I can see my progress, but at this point there is no way in HELL I will show them to anyone. Many props to the contestants on THE BIGGEST LOSER who do not get the choice of not showing their bodies at first. I am not sure I could be as brave or even emotionally handle all the hard work they are forced into. Even though they have fantastic results. I am so excited to see the start of a new season tomorrow. Maybe it will help to motivate me.

picture of the day

Sunday, January 2, 2011

took down the tree

today and it is amazing how good that felt. Though it was a lot of work, my house just seems so bare and that to me makes it feel clean. I did do a lot of cleaning today as well. Bill took the girls to my sister's house during the Steeler's game and I took advantage of getting my house into some kind of order. Tomorrow is the big day. School begins again which really makes my heart ache. It is so hard for me to get back in the swing of things and I am going to miss Mya so very much! At least it is a short week and she wont have to go on Friday. Tomorrow is also the day that I begin the new me. Goodbye fat hello MILF~ that is what I am talking about. Treadmill and slim fast. I am going to warn you all now, that I will be a bigger bitch dieting then I am when I am on my period. Just putting that out there. It is your choice if you care to be around me during this difficult time!

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Happy 1-1-11

Went to my neighbors last night. It was a fun time. I had 2 beers and about 10 Jello shots and way more taco dip then one person should ever have by themselves. Most of all there was lots of laughter. Today, my mom went way out of her way and made her traditional New Years food.
She always makes Pork, sauerkraut, hot dogs, and Kielbasa, but this year we also had turkey and stuffing and mashed potatoes. Then she painted the girls nails and put makeup on them like they were big girls about to go out for the night. I was fortunate in that my mom gave me awesome fuzzy soft socks. Thanks mom for all you and Dad do. Your much appreciated and very loved.

About Me

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I am a girl: Mom, Sister, Daughter, friend, Aunt and Wife. I like to eat (which has made me FAT) I love to start blogs and never continue them. Will this be the one I stick to? This blog will be about everything and nothing...duh, that is what the title says.

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